Meet The Geek Whisperer’s newest contributor, Arielle, and enjoy her first post:
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It’s kind of like a messed up fortune cookie up there, isn’t it.
To many comic fans, there is an age old argument. Batman. Or Superman. The Dark Knight. Or the Big Blue Boy Scout. For David and I, this argument goes back to at least middle school. Back then, it was all about who was a bigger BAMF. And obviously, Batman always won. I mean, come on! This argument is over before it begins!
However, as I’ve matured in life, or at least pretended too, my arguments for why Batman is way more totally awesome has changed. As a female of this species (wow, could I be any more geeky?), I’ve come to the stark realization that if I had a choice, I would much prefer to bone Batman. Alien species and Brody-esque dialogue aside, there’s just no way Clark Kent could ever hold a candle to the freakiness that one could expect to find and enjoy in Bruce Wayne’s boudoir. It’s just completely inconceivable that the pleasure one could derive from a brooding, masochistic quasi-nihilist would be better served on a self-righteous Truth-Justice-and-the-American-Way platter. No way.
We’re not factoring in Tom Welling of Smallville, but even if we were considering recent movie casting, Christian Bale still trumps Brandon Routh. Although I enjoy Tim Burton, I’m not going to get into some of the earlier Batman-franchise films. The mere mention of Bat-Nipples renders the later Joel Schumacher films completely inconsequential to any argument.
Bob Kane, Bill Finger, Frank Miller and Jeph Loeb all knew how to create a man with intelligence and grace that is so sexy and appealing to women that I cannot comprehend why merely destroying property value across Metropolis makes a man worthy of our erotic obsession.
Selina Kyle, she totally gets me on this one:
… Yet, there is something to be said about how a “Superman” never leaves his “Lois…”