After months of speculation, the creator of Conficker has revealed himself.

Now, for those of you who don’t know, I’m talking about the announcement earlier that Bill Gates made at his press conference when he admitted to writing the Conficker virus to give himself control over everyone’s computer.

“I left the security hole in Windows to allow me to one day start all of this.”  When asked what it it is he was starting, he simply smiled.

Microsoft products are installed on more than 99% of all of the world’s computers.  If this is Bill Gates’s first step towards taking control of all these computers then we might very well be screwed.

The exact outcome of this virus, although still not unclear, is going to leave us living in fear of Bill Gate.

“I tried my hand at philanthropy for a while but it just didn’t feel right. I needed to return to my roots and take another pass at conquering the world!” Gates concluded with an uncomfortably long and maniacal cackle.

Disclaimer – all information above has been gathered from reliable sources and can be verified with the use of the Interweb.

• Laughs