Let’s not beat around the bush… Michael Moore is a hypocritical, corpulent piece of crap.

As a rule, when I disagree with a person, I don’t like to ridicule them, I attack the substance of their ideas. When I call Mikey a bulky bowel movement I am not doing it for the purpose of mocking his weight, I do it because it goes directly to the heart of hypocrisy.

This fat, rich man has thrived in our capitalist system. He came from a humble family in Flint, Michigan and amassed a fortune. He sends his daughter to a private school, and earns millions of dollars as a movie-maker. Capitalism served him well. In our system he has prospered and reaped the benefits of his wealth… And there is nothing wrong with that. Nothing at all.

I can’t stand the guy, and I disagree with damn near everything he says. However, he makes a product that people are willing to buy, even if that product is based on partial truths and deception, he uncovered a demand, and like any good capitalist, he fulfills it.

So why the hell is he making a movie that calls for the destruction of the system that has afforded him the opportunity to thrive? I don’t really know. What I do know is that he has no viable suggestions for a better system. He calls for more “democracy” in our economy. It’s a sweet idea, and a great use of a word that no one likes to disagree with, but I have yet to see him suggest how that would work. Plus, what if the people decide on governing the economy in a way that Michael Moore finds distasteful? Many of us still like our right to keep and bear arms? I for one see it as a necessary freedom.We all know how Mikey feels on the subject.

Like an immigrant who made it to this country and now wishes to deny admission to new immigrants; the “this is my country, now get the hell out” mentality… Moore struck big, climbed to the top, and wants to torch the ladders. No one else may strive for greatness. Capitalism works, the United States works because there is an incentive to strive for more.

In any non-capitalist system, no man could grow as rotund as Michael Moore. He clearly eats more than his fair share… And that’s OK. He earned his money, he can spend it as he pleases. However, in the socialist utopia he imagines is possible, he would be a few hundred pounds lighter, his child would go to public school with the rest of the peasants, and there is a good chance he wouldn’t have the freedom of speech that his trade is built on.

Do Michael Moore a favor and don’t see his movie. So many people are hoping to make money off of it, and that is clearly wrong in Mikey’s eyes.

If you are still reading and want to see how half-baked his ideas are, watch his interview with Wolf Blitzer. Mikey spent all of this time making an anti-capitalism film and can’t articulate a semi-intelligent argument against the system, or propose a better alternative (Part one is all you need to watch, but I’m providing part two as well).

Can anyone tell me why he is wearing a hat for my school? As far as I know, he never had anything to do with Rutgers.

If you want to read more on Mikey’s hypocrisy, check out Michael Wilson’s work.

Finally, to give credit where it is due, the phrase “Limousine Leninist” came from commenter pst314 on the brilliant political blog Samizdata.

Sorry for the off-topic post. Mikey’s been ticking me off for a long time.

• Politics